We’ve all done it. At one time or another, we have all let some one or some thing invade one of our boundaries, leaving us feeling inconvenienced, taken advantage of, or maybe even just plain ol’ walked all over.
It could be that boss that has you working on a project that really could wait until Monday when you should be at home with your family. It could be that boyfriend or girlfriend who keeps tabs on your physical location at all times. It could be your well-meaning mom who insists on folding your undies and putting them away when she comes over to your place. It could be that friend who volunteers you to pay for the whole check at dinner because “you can afford it, right?”
There are many types of boundaries that can be crossed — which means there are many different ways we can allow others to take our power away. The good news is that there are many different types of boundaries one can set for themselves!
Some boundaries to focus on are:
- Emotional – preventing those who are emotionally needy or manipulative from draining our energy
- Physical – maintaining a sense of physical safety and only allowing those with permission to enter our physical space
- Financial – money is energy so only you should decide where to spend your own energy
- Chronological – valuing your time so that it is spent on the things that you decide, not what others decide for you
A few weeks ago, my family and I traveled up to Vancouver, BC to take our first class with the AMAZING healer Christa Lynn. Words cannot express the level of magic we all experienced in that class! It was just such a beautiful, healing, and strengthening experience.
In this class, we worked with the healing properties of Amazonite and used this beautiful and lively stone in a few meditations.
Using the amazonite in this way allowed myself and my family to discuss setting boundaries for ourselves and with each other. It reinforced for all of us that our boundaries are important and do not necessarily mean anything other than what we are comfortable with. It’s not a slight towards anyone. We don’t need to fear what anyone thinkos of us for setting those boundaries. What matters is that we honor ourselves first which then allows us to honor each other.
I can tell you from firsthand experience that learning to set boundaries makes room in your life to benefit from beautiful relationships.
Just as a fun little experiment, while at the beach this weekend, we sat in the middle of a large circle drawn in the sand. We intended this line in the sand to be our boundary so that no one on the beach would encroach on our space. Delightfully, we discovered that even the seagulls respected our boundaries. How magic is that?!
You too can try this at home! Here is an exercise that you can do to help establish a little more breathing room for your soul.
Boundary Setting Exercise:
- Creating space around yourself allows your soul to breath a little easier and not feel so intruded upon. Think of an area in your life where you have felt suffocated, imposed upon, or completely walked all over. Feel that feeling for a moment. Notice how uncomfortable it feels.
- Choose one area in your life that you would like to set a boundary: emotional, physical, financial, emotional.
- Close your eyes and imagine yourself sitting on the beach. You can be alone on the beach or surrounded by other people, either is fine.
- Imagine there is a circle drawn in the sand around where you are sitting. You are the only one inside of the circle.
- Then use your mind’s eye to envision that circle is getting larger, larger, and larger. Spread that circle out as far as you would like. As the circle grows, it pushes out other people and their energies, leaving you sitting in the circle with plenty of space. All the space you want!
Hopefully this exercise leaves you with a feeling of a peaceful power and allows you to stay centered within yourself. You are so strong! Don’t ever forget that.
Love and light, xox